I recently experienced a theft. My neighbor stole my car trailer. When confronted they returned it but had removed all the side panels. I requested he put it back together the way it was. He took the trailer again from my property and lied to me, claiming he was going to fix it. I discovered last Saturday that he had welded it for his own use and had no intention of returning it.
Like anyone would, I was angry, hurt, betrayed by a person I trusted. I took it personally. I have since made a “choice” about the situation. Though I am taking the legal actions to recover my property, I have chosen to feel differently about the situation and not remain angry.
I observed the inappropriate behavior, the rudeness and mean feelings that the wife displayed. I also observed how unhealthy she and her husband were, both physically and emotionally. I realized that the way they were behaving was a reflection of how they were treating themselves physically. I made a choice to feel differently. I felt compassion for these people. They aren’t treating themselves with love and respect, no wonder they can’t treat others that way!
I realized that my neighbors behavior was about them not me. I made a choice to feel differently. Moments after I made that choice I came upon an email that had this link. It was a for sure sign that giving blessings is far more beneficial than staying in anger.
I share this with you all because when we stay angry or bitter or we focus on “revenge”, we harm ourselves. When we stay focused on the “negative” energy, when we stay in the “blame” story, we attract more negative energy.
The only thing we have control over is our feelings
If you are currently experiencing negative emotions about someone or some situation, can you just for a time let it go, watch this video and if possible, have some compassion and maybe even some forgiveness, because in reality, they were probably doing the best they could with the upbringing they had?
Remember, it is not that you are condoning the bad behavior of others, it is about the way you choose to react, the emotions you generate affect you.
For more information on techniques to make the shift from negative to positive emotions, contact me!
Dr. Marlene Siegel